It’s been a while since I posted last. I’ve come to the realization that I don’t need anyone. I’m a strong enough human being that I can stand on my own. My friends are the reason I’m happy. Girls just piss me off. Even the ones that I technically call friends. They’re just straight up dumb. Their actions are bitchy at worst and selfish at best. They pretend they care. Blah this entry makes me angry just talking about it. I should just stop caring I guess. I don’t feel the motivation. Why should I feel motivated? Fuck it.
Make my whole body shake with the energy of Zeus! I should probably stop drinking them if I don’t want to explode. Just saying!
Time to get back to being a school kid again. Maybe I’ll meet some cool new people ha. I’m excited to meet new people. I just have to be social. I know I’ve told myself that same thing plenty of times but I still see it necessary to say it. Maybe just to make sure I actually follow through with it.
I’ve already started to hang with a new group of people that PJ brought to my birthday party. I just need to be as accepting as them ha.
I guess I really am a sucker huh? It just sucks when you figure out that things change when its not you.
What about this waiting till you actually mean “I Love You”? And waiting till a point till you call that person babe or some other pet name? Guess that was only for me right? Thanks for that. Makes me want to take all my feelings back, that I had for you.
Why drag me along? What did I do to deserve this? I’ve said this enough, “My feelings haven’t done shit for me but bring me the pain I don’t want.” Can I just break free already? I just want to break free from these emotional chains and fly like the bird I used to be. Well thanks for this neat cage I guess… Not…
Today is my birthday! So fucking stoked for the party tonight.
Ain’t nothing gonna break my stride, Or however that song goes.
I’m so glad I get to spend it with my friends and family. I couldn’t picture anywhere else I’d rather be than at this party surrounded by my friends and family. It will be one hell of a night. :)
So my birthday is in less than 24 hours! I can’t wait, seriously I need it to be now. So I can get wasted off my ass and give no fucks.
I felt a little down today for some reason. I’m not sure why. I haven’t thought of anything that would trigger that today at least I don’t think I did. That might be the bipolar part of me. Who knows? I’m sorry but emotions suck. They really do. I could definitely go without them. I’m sure I’d have fun without them.
People are really so closed minded about music. It’s retarded, like if you don’t like it that doesn’t mean you can just say it sucks. Half the shit you say sucks has more meaning to it than the music you think is so great.
You people are ridiculous!
It’s Christmas and I can’t sleep. I was dead tired at 9 so I went to bed only to wake up 3 hours later and lay in bed for 2 more hours and not be sleeping yet. Wtf mate?!
So I’m feeling over most of my bipolar feelings meow. At least I think so. My emotions are so weird and foreign to me. Is that bad? My own emotions feeling foreign to myself… That just sounds strange in itself.
I can’t wait for my birthday. It’s gonna be such an awesome time! Ugh I can already tell that that night will be one to remember ha.
Speaking of parties I’m kind of worried about a friend. We were partying at his place this weekend and his party got broken up by his aunts. I haven’t heard from him in a while and I don’t know if he’s made any status updates on Facebook. I fear he may be in jail or his phone got shut off. Either way I hope he’s gonna be alright.
Last night was a load of fun. So much alcohol! I’m just glad everyone is alright. It’s too bad the party got broken up but better his aunts than the police ha. I was on a heater with this dude Mark at beer pong. No one was gonna stop us. Work today is gonna be interesting. 8+ hours of work after last night will be quite the adventure. Can’t wait haha.
Life is getting better meow. I’m excited for Christmas to say the least. Maybe I just hit a rough patch with my emotions a few. We will see I guess. I think I have more energy than usual. That or I’m getting used to working more. This Christmas time has been a whole bunch of work for me. I’m hoping it pays off with lots of presents and money!!
I should probably start saving money. I think its about time for me to buckle down on that stuff. I used to be good about saving but not so much anymore. I don’t have any money saved at all, must fix as soon as possible.
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